learning from my daughter

• Grace had her first-ever kindergarten performance a few weeks ago. Yes, indeed, Grace danced beautifully and had a great time. But even something as simple as a school performance can get interesting when you throw a little cultural misunderstanding into the mix.
• Generally, information in this country is on a need-to-know-only basis. Or should I say, information is generally given at the last possible minute. Many of my local friends think it's odd we foreigners like to plan things out SO FAR in advance! I knew from Grace's teacher they would be having some sort of performance around Halloween weekend but info. was sketchy even 2 days out. [On a side note, we have lived overseas nearly 7 years and this was the first year it seemed to me people even knew about Halloween. Ugh, of all the holidays to get imported and passed on over, this one is not my favorite but I won't get going on that subject.]
• So, on Thursday of that week I asked Grace's teacher when the performance would be, and she said they hadn't decided yet. On Friday I picked her up and they said Grace needed to be at school that evening for a rehearsal and that the performance would be Saturday. She gave me 2 slips of paper, one inviting all parents to come to the performance, which had all the regular admonishments to "be cultured," "not throw trash on the school grounds," etc. etc. And the other small note simply mentioned the kids would be dressing up in costumes and asked the parents to make sure boys wore dark pants. There was NO mention of what the girls should wear. I even had my friend double-check with me to make sure I read the Chinese correctly.
• When I picked Grace up from her rehearsal Friday evening, the teacher asked me if Grace had any "princess dresses." I said she has a Snow White dress (since that was what Grace wanted to wear this year), and the teacher said, "Perfect, have her wear it!" Grace told me on the way home that the teachers tried to have her try on some dresses, but none of them fit. They were "WAY too short" as she put it. Yes, even at 5 my foreigner child towers over her peers. I told Grace "No problem! You can wear your Snow White dress and have so much fun!" She agreed and was excited to wear her Snow White dress for the big dance.
• So here were my assumptions based on the little information I had: Each class would do some sort of performance, kids could dress up however they wanted, and the school would provide little costumes for kids who didn't have any. Ummmm, no.
• The performances were not done according to classes. Not all the kids at the school gave performances, only a few kids in the older classes. The dancers were put together from various classes and were supposed to all wear the same little costume.

The school went all out and decorated. I mean, they even wrote "Happy Hallo" on the wall.

• I had dropped Grace off earlier that day at the school's request. The kids were going to practice again. And, apparently put on make-up for all the little girls. Grace saw me come in with Trinity and was so happy to see us. Daddy was out of town and hated to miss this but I recorded it for him. (And because I was trying to keep an eye on Trinity while also recording Grace's performance, I'm totally claiming that as the reason for the following poorly-photographed moments!!) 5 little pumpkins got up to dance first. This should have been my first clue. I'm slow, people. And then Snow White and the other dancers got ready for their big dance. Hmmm, which one of these is not like the others? My heart kind of sank a little when I saw how different Grace's outfit looked. As if being the only white kid in the bunch didn't make her stick out enough. But you know what? My big girl got out there and danced beautifully and didn't miss a step. She had a blast from start to finish. Didn't even mention one time the entire evening about wearing a different outfit from the other kids. As my mother pointed out later, even as a kid of five I would have been MORTIFIED to be the "different" kid in that scenario.
  I praise God for giving Grace a personality that doesn't mind being a little different. I truly pray that as she grows up, she doesn't mind going against the flow if it's for the right reasons. I pray her growing-up years, especially her middle school ones aren't plagued with constant insecurity like mine were. I was so proud of you Grace!!

  Thankfully, Grace's performance was one of the first because afterward, this little bundle of energy decided she needed to explore the playground. And keeping up with her was no small feat that evening. I'm not sure if Trinity or Grace had more fun.